Don't let the darkness get you down ..

Breaking News

Charlie sheen!  H.I.V. Positive... Is it official, like most: I wasn’t shocked at the alleged and now factual news?  It’s always sad to hear and accept that anyone’s health is diminishing but let this be a lesson to all.  Eventually, your past will catch up to you!  Did he think he above the natural laws? Do any of us think we are?    After all the years he spent battling drug and sex addictions, sure we all hope for the best deep down .. but did anyone expect different? Before we get all emotional, don’t forget all the medical advances and breakthrough we’ve had with the virus.   Charlie has $ although he claims most of it is gone due to pricey extortion fees he endure attempting to hide his realty for the last FOUR YEAR {SCUM BAG} , I trust he is better off that me and I am sure he will be able to upkeep his condition for the years to come.  In fact: I bet Charlie Sheen won’t die of HIV or AIDS.

Moving along

Trump and the republicans, I am the only one that feels this is a complete mockery of the United States Government?  Has this not gone too far? For such a conservative party to house such a liberal candidate should speak volumes. They can back him all they want and it doesn’t make me more of a believer, this is a joke!  There is no way they actually want this guy to win? Can anyone with enough money run for presidency? Donald Trump, who publiclyHillary: vitamins and get it together you’re looking weak, fainting in crowds

embarrassed the Hispanic race as whole, is still the front runner for the Republican Party?   I am convinced this is a joke!   Actually, looking back into Obama’s presidency my overall opinion proves that theory to be correct?  Obama was given a grave opportunity and he broke barriers and set records just the not the ones I was hoping for. My best guest... Is the Republicans have chosen their own “black” president:  Ben Carson will surely run against Hillary.  We have about a year until things really get interesting.. But

Lastly Topic:

With Thanksgiving around the corner Northerners are accustomed to having dreadful weather this time of year. By now, mass transit has been delayed, snow days are in place and our warmest gear has been taking out of storage.  Well, I for one I am happy to report to all of you southerners that we aren’t buried in snow, we aren’t frozen to our toes (just yet) and the Sun is definitely shining down on us this fall.  Warning:  my next statement is going to sound … ignorant:  but…. Among the list of negatives, there is one positive affect of global warming: making easier living for the northern states!  Every winter the south finds no greater pleasure than streamlining their sunshine and perfect weather.  It’s sad, because everyone knows they will trade that sunshine “good old snow ball fight” any day!  The ones that have experiences it... Cherish it... And the ones who haven’t: dream of it.  Looks like for the time being.. This season the tables have turned. I vote:  this season we all fill our website and profiles with amazing pictures: falls leaves and frozen lakes, dog walks and ice skating trips.  Of our finest fall gear fall gear that you Floridians only dream of one day wearing:  sipping our hot chocolates and munchies on warm pretzels.. Yes!  my fellow New Yorkers don’t let the darkness get you down. Enjoy this weather while it last.. Happy Holidays..

L3  

Hell has no fury as a Hispanic man with a crush ego

You’ve got to be kidding me! I said to myself as the text came through,” I don’t know your situation and I don’t care, I want you: and I know you want me too” I busted into a monumental laugh: Right smack in the middle of the NY SPORTS CLUB.. (giggle) .. On my salary more like Blink fitness. .{Which is not only economical  .. it’s actually  impressive}.  Back to the story.. The laugh was loud enough to catch a few stares.  “Now this?”  I thought to myself. “I want you too”??  the phrase kept ringing in my head ..” Oh this dude lost his mind.”  What am I suppose to say?  “Yea your right you got me … the agony has been killing me”  “Everyone knows it” he texted to back up his theory.  And by “everyone “he must be refereeing to group of co-workers with whom I have never uttered a single word beside “good morning.. Or good night.”  “You know I want you to” Come again MR.!

FACTS:  There is no wrong in directly stating your intentions. However, if you make a bold move.. Don’t back track and try to bring me down with you! Blaming me for the lack of respect presented in your delivery because you ASS U MED that I wanted you too?? And let me guess “wanting u ”  warrens a less respectful approach?  You’re a keeper! .. FYI.   If I was into you... Your delivery was enough for me to not want u.  

The PLOT THICKENS:  Yes he worked with me for a couple of months. (KEEP IN MIND NONE OF THIS OCCURRED UNTIL AFTER HE QUIT)   The day he leaves... I offered to keep in touch. We exchanged FB’s where I quickly noticed and respected the fact that he appeared to be a family guy.   Along with the wife I noticed we had friends in common.  Turns out prince charming is connected to my closest group of friends, including my ex of 5 years and my brother! ..  Even more of a reason to make a connection... So I thought..  

PUTTING THE PIECES TOGETHER:  We’ve established he knows my circle of friends. We’ve also know we worked together.  . Okay given the facts this man-child while under the influence of God knows what decided to “come at me” like a dog in heat , am I not to be insulted?  Truth is  I wasn’t the least bit into him.  So what was my response?  No,  I didn’t run and tell my big brother (although I should have) ... I responded the response we all  respond when we’re  at a loss for words : “LOL” … OH. YEAH and I ran straight to my Ex to clear my name of any possible rumors... Hell has no fury as a Hispanic man with a crush ego ... that lesson was learned years ago..   And although the EX and I are a thing of the past.. The love and respect still remains intact..

FINAL THOUGHT:

To my bold sexter whose name shall remain unsaid .. for the record .. The only thing I ever wanted from you was to get my work completed in a timely fashion 

Back to square one .. (The Afterthought of 20 somethang)

It  began as documented observation of a young, heterosexual, hispanic woman approaching 30 demographically from the "ghettos of the Bronx..  Am I dating.. will I marry?  The journey of the perfect job. Mean while up until 2 years ago I ping ponged in and out of unemployment, and the last time I took anyone serious Snookie and the gang  arrived at the Jersey Shore.  Like most who are given a platform what I ended up with was a rant. A overall detailed story of how much of a mess my life actually was, written proof that all Puerto Rician women were crazy!
 I recently found myself in a oh too common conversation regarding the opposite sex.  As I heard myself speak of my present wants and needs, I could help but pause.. "what am I saying?" "Who is talking"   " keep it up .. you'll never get a boyfriend "  and later than night, I went to check the records.  I pulled up 20somethang (my older blog) and went to town: reading and comparing my older post.  This was pretty cool .. I knew exactly where to reference the past.   The problem with physical  diary's is  after a few years the writing smears  or even worst  book is lost.  Another cool fact about blogging .. Someone is reading and sharing your thoughts.  As I laid back reviewing my thoughts .. I was taken away by the anger, humor,  sadness, and plan raw honesty I was experiencing at the time,  I was more shocked that I made it all public!  With no reserve, no filter other than a couple of 'typos" it was  just Tee.
Looking back I don't think it was ever my plan to settle early, of course at the time I didn't realize I was a mess! I thought I was part of the "norm" a member of a society where amazing women weren't being taken serious.  Turns out I was the liar, looking for social acceptance, Living one life in the public eye and another alone in my head.   Few saw the truth in me, but I shun the accusations: " I am serious" .. " I do love you"  ME? SELFISH? IN IT FOR MYSELF?? NO WAY! .. ( I could have been a man)  "I want this relationship", "I want to make it work at this job."  and when I was dumped or laid off.. I cried .. I cried and mourned .. because it was expected of me.. How would I look to others if I brushed off my shoulders and said " another one bites the dust ..?"  So..  I faked it .. I didn't realize I was faking it .. but I did I wanted to be that person more than most.. I faked it so good that I believed my lies .. but time and time again for some reason or another  .. I always ended up back at square one.
So I find myself here definitely not 20 something .. and once again  back at square one.

Only this time I'm OWNING IT! .. sure there are time that I hate being me .. (mainly once a month for about 5 to 6 days while I lay in bed wishing I had someone to pass me the midol . ) but fore the most part .. I'm Loving it .. 

LIVE 

LEARN 

LOVE 

Thanks for checking in .. XoXo   ..